Ugh…my mind is turning to mush. I’m definitely hitting the wall now. Too much willow is turning my brain to ooze. Today, I sat down to write Willow and all I typed out was mush. I’ve been concentrating on it for too long. I want to do something else. Bleh….
Yesterday was the 15th of November. I’ve written 25,811 words on Willow so far this month. That’s roughly 5-1/2 chapters I’ve written. We’re at the halfway point, folks.
This is just like running a marathon. First moment, you’re running and you think, this isn’t bad. Then you start jogging and get a little tired, but you find your stride and rhythm and think, hey, I can do this. This is easy. Then you start getting cocky. I can do this alllll day. Look at me! Look at me! Then you foolishly, foolishly start to sprint. You get a good speed going and it’s great. You’re top of the world, Ma!
And then the wall falls. Right on your head. Boom.
All this freewriting, all this creativity, is churning my brains into bits of mental stew. I’ve think I’ve pulled a charley horse somewhere in my writing muscle is seriously cramping up. You know how bad this is? I just poured some tea into an empty cup. Took a sip out of it. Then turned and saw another steaming cup of tea sitting on my left. My laptop is now flanked by two steaming cups of tea.
This, then, would be the absolutely downside of NaNoWriMo. You can’t let your mind rest. You gotta keep focusing, focusing on doing the same thing. But my creativity doesn’t like work like that. I like to write something, then let it rest for a couple of days, let it percolate, if you will. Then I can revisit it again with fresh eyes and a fresh mind.
I didn’t mind working on Willow once a day, because I always had something else to work on too at the same time–a short story, essay, poetry, and that would be usually editing, which exercises a different creative muscle than just flat-out freewriting. But so far, the only thing I’ve been doing now is freewriting Willow, and it’s beginning to take its toll. If it wasn’t for writing this blog, my head probably would’ve exploded by now.
I can hear the essay I was working on in October calling out to me. “LaShawn…why haven’t you touched me? I need editing! These passive verbs aren’t going to go away on their own. Worrrrrk on meeeeee….worrrrk on meeeeee….” Yep. You know you’re working hard when you start hallucinating about your essay begging in a whiny voice. Maybe it’s time to stop writing this and to work on Willow again.